Stuff to Make Us Laugh

[oldcopper]

17 hours ago, Peckris 2 said:

Ok. Name me one benefit Brexit has delivered?

Not really relevant. The twin pillars that are going to do in our economy, and are already doing so, are Net Zero and the massive government borrowing/money printing due to lockdowns and furlough, which is devaluing our currency, and inflation was already on a steep upward trajectory before the Ukraine war.

Both of the above I'm sure you were and are fully in favour of, and how are our fellow European economies doing - booming? The powerhouse of Europe, Germany in an energy crisis of its own "green" making and about to tip into recession, according to economists. 

 

[Peckris 2]

21 hours ago, jelida said:

Professor David Spiegelhalter, who I saw at the Hay Festival,  acknowledged this as being a UK success story.

Jerry

I agree. But it had very little to do with being in or out of the EU - contrary to opinion in some quarters, there was a great deal of freedom in negotiating with individual companies, it's just that most EU members thought (possibly mistakenly in this one particular issue) that they'd do better going with the overall EU negotiations. Also, we developed the AstraZeneca vaccine early due to our brilliant scientists at Oxford, and that would have happened whether or not we were EU members.

[jelida]

29 minutes ago, Peckris 2 said:

I agree. But it had very little to do with being in or out of the EU - contrary to opinion in some quarters, there was a great deal of freedom in negotiating with individual companies, it's just that most EU members thought (possibly mistakenly in this one particular issue) that they'd do better going with the overall EU negotiations. Also, we developed the AstraZeneca vaccine early due to our brilliant scientists at Oxford, and that would have happened whether or not we were EU members.

It had everything to do with not being in the EU. As you correctly say, there was a lot of flexibility in terms of negotiation regarding the vaccine. But also, as you correctly say most EU members opted for the ‘United’ approach. In this respect they were hampered by massive bureaucracy and inter-state competition for resources which impaired their decision making process. Even when presented with access to an effective and inexpensive vaccine,  developed with British money and expertise, in which they had declined to invest heavily or place early contracts for, they actively maligned the vaccine in many quarters, misrepresenting the risk/benefit ratio and discouraging usage as exemplified by Macron’s stupid pronouncements. Had we still been in the EU would things have been different? Well, there would have been considerable pressure to conform to a united approach, and we probably would have done. But if we had acted as we in fact did ,  but as EU members , we could have been restrained by EU compliance and regulatory delays and possibly contracted differently and there is no guarantee the outcomes would have been the same.  So outside the EU we had a very successful vaccine rollout. Within the EU we might still have done reasonably,  but we certainly wouldn’t have done better and would most likely have done worse. Quite frankly, logically it’s a no-brainer.

Jerry. 

[Peckris 2]

19 hours ago, jelida said:

It had everything to do with not being in the EU. As you correctly say, there was a lot of flexibility in terms of negotiation regarding the vaccine. But also, as you correctly say most EU members opted for the ‘United’ approach. In this respect they were hampered by massive bureaucracy and inter-state competition for resources which impaired their decision making process. Even when presented with access to an effective and inexpensive vaccine,  developed with British money and expertise, in which they had declined to invest heavily or place early contracts for, they actively maligned the vaccine in many quarters, misrepresenting the risk/benefit ratio and discouraging usage as exemplified by Macron’s stupid pronouncements. Had we still been in the EU would things have been different? Well, there would have been considerable pressure to conform to a united approach, and we probably would have done. But if we had acted as we in fact did ,  but as EU members , we could have been restrained by EU compliance and regulatory delays and possibly contracted differently and there is no guarantee the outcomes would have been the same.  So outside the EU we had a very successful vaccine rollout. Within the EU we might still have done reasonably,  but we certainly wouldn’t have done better and would most likely have done worse. Quite frankly, logically it’s a no-brainer.

Jerry. 

We wouldn't have done better, for sure. I guess it's one of those "we'll never know" questions. One thing's certain however - being in the EU wouldn't have prevented the criminal discharges to care homes (and then death) in the first lockdown. The EU had far less influence over our internal affairs than the average voter realised and Johnson would still have gone ahead with that totally wretched policy.

Correction: if we'd still been in the EU, Cameron would still have been PM and I doubt his lot would have done the same shocking thing.

[blakeyboy]

.....this is in the 'Stuff to Make us Laugh' section, after all....:-)

[Peckris 2]

1 hour ago, blakeyboy said:

.....this is in the 'Stuff to Make us Laugh' section, after all....:-)

Yeah, the wrong place.

[jelida]

6 minutes ago, Peckris 2 said:

Yeah, the wrong place.

I can’t imagine how it happened……….

OK. Name me one benefit Brexit has delivered?

[1949threepence]

[Sword]

Quoting the late John Smith, "He wasn't stabbed in the back, he shot himself in the foot!"

Edited July 17, 2022 by Sword

[copper123]

The strange thing is the right wing of the party seem to think that every law that passed into british law from europe  over the last fifty or so years was bad and wants them all recinded - surely they cannot all have been bad ?

Or maybe the EEC was the Nazi party in disguise after losing the second world war

[1949threepence]

[Peckris 2]

10 hours ago, copper123 said:

The strange thing is the right wing of the party seem to think that every law that passed into british law from europe  over the last fifty or so years was bad and wants them all recinded - surely they cannot all have been bad ?

Well, the EU did have complete control over our laws.

Oh, apart from ...

Pensions and the entire welfare state

The NHS and public health generally

Transport, including airlines, railways, and road systems

Housing, town planning, construction

Taxation, including income tax, corporation tax, excise duties

Police, criminal justice, and public order

The army, navy, and airforce

Local authorities and everything they do such as roads, refuse, the fire service, parks and recreation

Alternative energy sources, nuclear reactors, power stations and the national grid

But those pesky Brussels bureaucrats insisted on meddling in things such as food standards, drinking water quality, health and safety at work, the cleanliness of our beaches, workers rights, etc. I mean, who the hell did they think they were?

[jelida]

35 minutes ago, Peckris 2 said:

Well, the EU did have complete control over our laws.

Oh, apart from ...

Pensions and the entire welfare state

The NHS and public health generally

Transport, including airlines, railways, and road systems

Housing, town planning, construction

Taxation, including income tax, corporation tax, excise duties

Police, criminal justice, and public order

The army, navy, and airforce

Local authorities and everything they do such as roads, refuse, the fire service, parks and recreation

Alternative energy sources, nuclear reactors, power stations and the national grid

But those pesky Brussels bureaucrats insisted on meddling in things such as food standards, drinking water quality, health and safety at work, the cleanliness of our beaches, workers rights, etc. I mean, who the hell did they think they were?

Quite frankly, Peck, this is rather pathetic. Others have tried to move on from the desperate politicking,  this thread is to do with humour and you are massively missing the mark. Brexit is done and dusted,  it doesn’t help you to take things you can’t change so seriously, move on and yourself a favour.

Jerry

(with apologies, but I doubt I’m the only one getting fed up with this stuck record.)

[Diaconis]

What did the EU do for us😂

 

[oldcopper]

15 hours ago, Diaconis said:

What did the EU do for us😂

 

Wrong scene!

[1949threepence]

now then, now then.....what a prize eh? 

 

[blakeyboy]

I once wrote to Jim to ask if he could fix it for me to be on 'It's a Knockout'.

Seemed a good idea at the time....

[blakeyboy]

[Peckris 2]

1 hour ago, 1949threepence said:

now then, now then.....what a prize eh? 

 

Bring birth certificate or other ID - no-one over 18 allowed...

[copper123]

On 7/27/2022 at 9:40 PM, 1949threepence said:

now then, now then.....what a prize eh? 

 

Free £50 is OK think I will pass on the company for the meal though

[1949threepence]

letters written to the council by tenants:

1. It's the dogs mess that I find hard to swallow.

2. I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and burnt my knob off.

3.. I wish to complain that my father twisted his ankle very badly when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

4. Their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls against my fence.

5. I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet roof. I think it was bad wind the other day that blew them off.

6.. My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

7. I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from the wall.

8. Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

9. I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen..

10. 50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster, and 50% are just plain filthy.

11. The next door neighbour has got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I just can't take it anymore.

12. The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it is cleared.

13. Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny colour and not fit to drink.

14. Our lavatory seat is broken in half and now is in three pieces.

15. I want to complain about the farmer across the road. Every morning at 6am his cock wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

16. The man next door has a large erection in the back garden, which is unsightly and dangerous.

17. Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like a third, so please send someone round to do something about it.

18. I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you please do something about the noise made by the man on top of me every night.

19. Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and satisfy my wife...

20. I have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times but I still have no satisfaction.

21. This is to let you know that our lavatory seat is broke and we can't get BBC2.

22. My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage has fungus growing in it. (Yes, that's very serious I think )

[copper123]

A real place in hong kong

[copper123]

On 7/17/2022 at 11:51 PM, jelida said:

Quite frankly, Peck, this is rather pathetic. Others have tried to move on from the desperate politicking,  this thread is to do with humour and you are massively missing the mark. Brexit is done and dusted,  it doesn’t help you to take things you can’t change so seriously, move on and yourself a favour.

Jerry

(with apologies, but I doubt I’m the only one getting fed up with this stuck record.)

He forgot the straigtened bananas that the EU had in store for us as well - well acording to the sun they did

[copper123]

more funnies from a chinese menu

[blakeyboy]

For many years, the Chinese restaurant on the corner of Tavistock Street in Bletchley had a sign that read:

 

'All you can eat....from £15'

 

I never got my head round it....it's wonderful....:-)