If the First World War was a bar fight.....

[blakeyboy]

Germany, Austria and Italy are stood together in the middle of the pub, when Serbia bumps into Austria, and spills Austria’s pint.

Austria demands Serbia buy it a complete new suit, because there are splashes on its trouser leg.

Germany expresses its support for Austria’s point of view.

Britain recommends that everyone calm down a bit.

Serbia points out that it can’t afford a whole suit, but offers to pay for cleaning Austria’s trousers.

Russia and Serbia look at Austria.

Austria asks Serbia who it’s looking at.

Russia suggests that Austria should leave its little brother alone.

Austria inquires as to whose army will assist Russia in compelling it to do so.

Germany appeals to Britain that France has been looking at it, and that this is sufficiently out of order that Britain should not intervene.

Britain replies that France can look at who it wants to, that Britain is looking at Germany too, and what is Germany going to do about it?

Germany tells Russia to stop looking at Austria, or Germany will render Russia incapable of such action.

Britain and France ask Germany whether it’s looking at Belgium.

Turkey and Germany go off into a corner and whisper. When they come back, Turkey makes a show of not looking at anyone.

Germany rolls up its sleeves, looks at France, and punches Belgium.

France and Britain punch Germany. Austria punches Russia. Germany punches Britain and France with one hand and Russia with the other.

Russia throws a punch at Germany, but misses and nearly falls over. Japan calls over from the other side of the room that it’s on Britain’s side, but stays there. Italy surprises everyone by punching Austria.

Australia punches Turkey, and gets punched back. There are no hard feelings, because Britain made Australia do it.

France gets thrown through a plate glass window, but gets back up and carries on fighting. Russia gets thrown through another one, gets knocked out, suffers brain damage, and wakes up with a complete personality change.

Italy throws a punch at Austria and misses, but Austria falls over anyway. Italy raises both fists in the air and runs round the room chanting.

America waits till Germany is about to fall over from sustained punching from Britain and France, then walks over and smashes it with a barstool, then pretends it won the fight all by itself.

By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany’s fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

And when Germany wakes up, it goes out to its car, gets the gun out of the glovebox and heads back inside...

[Peckris]

Ha! Now try the Syria situation - that makes WW1 look like a cinch! 

[blakeyboy]

I've already got me coat......

[1949threepence]

Then Belgium says "leave me out of all this", to which England, Germany and France reply that they're already in it up to their eyeballs, like it or not.   

[zookeeperz]

Kim jong un enters the room with his new bestest mate Donald Trump . To which Trumps says " Hey Little rocket man shall we test out your rockets to see how far they can reach?"

[copper123]

if trump and kim had sex this would be the result?

Looks like little britain gone mad

[Sword]

On 4/25/2018 at 9:47 PM, blakeyboy said:

By now all the chairs are broken, and the big mirror over the bar is shattered. Britain, France and America agree that Germany threw the first punch, so the whole thing is Germany’s fault . While Germany is still unconscious, they go through its pockets, steal its wallet, and buy drinks for all their friends.

And when Germany wakes up, it goes out to its car, gets the gun out of the glovebox and heads back inside...

The war reparation demanded in April 1921 was equivalent to £6600 million or about a quarter of the then known gold reserves of the entire world. So I think it is more like "While Germany is still unconscious, they sold him into slavery ..."

[zookeeperz]

36 minutes ago, Sword said:

The war reparation demanded in April 1921 was equivalent to £6600 million or about a quarter of the then known gold reserves of the entire world. So I think it is more like "While Germany is still unconscious, they sold him into slavery ..."

Kind of ironic that they should ask us to pay 236 million to leave the EU when twice we let them off what they owed. Double double standards

[Peckris]

5 hours ago, copper123 said:

if trump and kim had sex this would be the result?

Looks like little britain gone mad

The only Un in the village?